Skip to Content

Raves vs. Church

Raves: Thousands of people dance to transcendent music, led by a magician behind the turntables.

Church: Thousands of people listen to sermons about avoiding hell (and raves).

Let’s face it, how some people want to spend eternity is a little questionable. At raves, people do things that might send them to hell… At church, people are trying to avoid hell…

These institutions share some common traits. Let’s break down the similarities and differences between our favorite ways to be influenced.

Raves Vs. Church

Raves vs. Church - heaven on earth

Where would you rather spend the weekend? At a rave festival show or getting yelled at for your sinful thoughts?

DJ is behind the decks.

Preacher is behind the pulpit.

DJ pumps up the crowd.

Preacher inspires the crowd.

DJ takes the crowd on a journey.

The preacher tries to keep you from going on a journey – to hell.

POINTS: RAVE

DJ Vs. Preacher – Raves vs. Church

DJ vs. Preacher
The Scumfrug Vs. The Mega Church

DJ: A conduit to transcendence (trancenDANCE), the DJ takes a crowd on a journey to new mental playgrounds. DJ’s are Superstars. Kids want to grow up to be DJs. DJ’s get the girl. DJ’s are the girl.

Preacher: For some, the preacher represents the spiritual wise-man, capable of leading them to heaven, or at least to avoid hell. As Christianity wanes in popularity, the power of the preacher to inspire follows suit. OBEY.

POINTS: RAVE

The Sacrament

rave vs. dj - the sacrament: raves vs. church
Steve Aoki Cake vs. The Body of Christ

Let’s face it, getting slammed in the face with a sheet cake is not my idea of a good time. However, it IS better than envisioning that your are literally eating the body of your dead savior.

POINTS: RAVE

Unity Vs. Uniformity – Raves vs. Church

rave vs. church - inclusive vs. exclusive
PLUR = Peace Love UNITY and Respect

Rave grew out of an inclusive ideology. PLUR, which stands for Peace, Love, Unity and Respect, was the rave culture’s unofficial motto when I was going to parties in the 90’s. It never caught on, but it engenders the opposite of the Mormon choir’s very white sensibilities.

POINTS: RAVE

Be Yourself Vs. Beg Forgiveness – Raves vs. Church

rave vs. church - do your thing vs. beg forgiveness

Rave’s invite you to break out of your cocoon, connect with the universal wow, and be more you. Christianity, and most religions, want you to be prostrate to a higher power and beg forgiveness for being born with carnal sin.

POINTS: RAVE

Worship in Your Own Way Vs. Our way or the Highway – Raves vs. Church

rave vs. church - worship your own way or US or Hell

Want to DJ in a hot air balloon? Cool. Want to party on a waterfall or a fancy castle? Check out Cercle for some of the craziest and most stylish ways to rave.

Or you can pick the Christian way, which equals doing what a bunch of old white dudes want you to do. That always works out great…

POINTS: RAVE

Dancing Vs. Worshipping the Cosmic Grandpa

Rave vs. Church

Face it, what we all want to be doing all the time is dancing around and having a good time. You can try to deny it, but I won’t have it.

What we DON’T want to do is to piss off the old man in the sky. Because he is super serious and doesn’t like to be made fun of, he has no sense of humor and hates dancing.

POINTS: RAVE (Tomorrowland)

After the Party

Rave vs. church

After a rave, your life is different. You can’t see things the way they were anymore. You have gone through the universal portal and can’t unsee; you can’t undance all that dancing.

After church, you can go to Perkins and wonder, “How can I go to my first rave?”

Raves vs. Church WINNER: RAVES